A Conversation with a Scammer

May 17, 2014

I could¬† title this “How to lose a girl in 20 minutes or less”, but since it was obviously a scammer… So last week I get a message on Facebook from a girl, who shall remain nameless. I knew from the start that it was a scammer, but for some reason, I decided to entertain it. It didn’t take long before she was asking about my work.

Me: “So is that what you are doing for work now?”
Her:For now am not working. Am planning on it that once am able to claim my late Pa properties and assets here in Nigeria, I’ll invest and start some business with the cash”

Me: “You live in Nigeria?”
Her: “Am here for my late Pa claims I would be back to the State once am through with the claimings”

Me: “So when do you expect that to be?”
Her: “I don’t know yet. Just that somethings are tying me down here”

Me: “Oh ok. Well, I think you are very beautiful and I wish you luck on returning to the states soon”
Her: “Some issues are tying me down here. And I don’t want to inconvenient people with my problems”

Me: “Of course not. That’s a good way to chase people off”
Her: “So, I don’t want to chase you off. So, its better I keep my problems to myself alone. Its my cross and I’ll have to bear it alone. I have got to go now”

Me:¬† “Ok good luck!”

Day 2

Her: “Hello”
Me: “How are you?”

Her: “Am getting pissed off by someone”
Me: “What happened?”

Her: “Did I give you the full deatail of what am here in Nigeria for?”
Me: “No”

Her: “I told you I went for my inheritance claim of my late pa right. I believe that was all I told you. But there are more to it
I haven’t said this to someone else just for security reasons. I don’t know if I can trust you. Can I trust you on this? That you won’t tell anyone about what am about to tell you?”
Me:“promise. You can trust me”

Her: “Good.. Am trusting you for your words. I’m having about $1.6m back there in a local bank my dad opened before he died with my name on it in a checking account So I’ve got a lawyer here about starting the processing of the inheritance but she’s really making me mad here
Me: “I see”

Her: “Now the lawyer ask me to pay the sum of $10,000….. Nd I don’t have all that with me.. All that I’m left with now is $100”
Me:“Oh no”

Her: “and I’m told to pay half payment and when she’s done with the whole processing then I pay the rest from the money in the account”
Me: “So you really need to get a job for about a year to get that money. You should find another lawyer because a good lawyer will tell you the cost up front and then collect when you get your payment. So, fire your lawyer find one that will get it at the time you receive your money… or you can come back to the United States and work at a job and save money up and then take care of it. I’m glad to help you. That should solve your problem. Trust me, fire your lawyer.”

Her: “I haven’t got the money for the trip back to the State”
Me: “Well, you’re going to have to find a new lawyer then. Explain to them the situation and once they know for sure that you have access to 1.6 million dollars, they will gladly help you for payment due at the time you get your money. That’s how lawyers operate. Sounds like you got a really crappy lawyer. I’m kind of surprised by it honestly. I mean, you went to college.”

Her: “Things doesn’t work that way here. It is payment before service here. Am f****ng fed up”
Me: “I bet. I don’t know what to tell you. Can you get a job there? Work temporarily until you can get the money saved up?
I mean, if I had that much money at stake, that’s what I would do. Shoot, I wouldn’t even waste my time asking people for help. they would want too much in return.”

Her: “I can try that. But its gonna take me a year I think to save such amount”
Me: “It would be much better to work and save money. Yes, but it’s 1.6 million dollars. That year is nothing. I mean, how much is it worth to you? I mean, for that much money, I would work for a year to get it. I’d work two jobs, wouldn’t even tell anybody about it. The more you tell people, they more they are going to be looking for you because they are going to want your money. My advice, don’t ask anybody for help. Just keep it to yourself, work two jobs so you can get the money faster. You can do it, I believe in you.”

Her: “But I was just thinking maybe I can possibly get some to help with some amount and I’ll pay back with interest or percentage”
Me: “I wouldn’t tell that to anybody. There are a lot of scammers out there and you don’t want to get scammed. Trust me, work hard with two jobs and save it up. With that much money at stake, it will be easier than you imagine The more you tell people, the more you will attract scammers. Everybody knows scammers are low class trash, but you never know when you come across one. They will look at you and see dollar signs. You think they are helping you but what they will want it to take all of your money and leave you there in Africa, penniless, unable to return. Just play it safe, get a job.

Her: “That sucks. Okay. But its gonna take me some time to get the job. But its what I’ll do”
Me: “Yes, you should. And when you do, you will thank me because I helped you keep scammers away.

Her:“Thanks”
Me: “I do not want money. But when you return to the United States, I probably can help you with a job but it doesn’t sound like you will need one after this next year.”

Her: “I’ll want to invest and start up something big”
Me: “I’ll be honest with you though. I wish you wouldn’t have told me that because I was very interested in dating you and I don’t want you to think that I was because of money. You’re very beautiful and I think you will make a wonderful wife to some man some day.”

Her: “You are an honest person. I don’t see you as a gold digger”
Me: “I’m smart and funny too. I know, but now that you told me that, you’ll always wonder, was he interested in me because of the money? So I will be your friend, and maybe you can see what a wonderful guy I am”

Her: “I don’t have such in mind. But can I ask for a favour??? Pls don’t disclose this to anyone”
Me: “Sure. I won’t. It’s our secret. I don’t want you to attract the low life scammers who make people suffer and don’t even feel remorseful over it.”

Her: “Thanks. Once again, pls you’ll have to help me on something”
Me: “Well, when you come back I would like to take you to Hawaii, strictly as friends.
and if you want something more, you tell me.”

Her: “I’ll need some cash as a running cost to move around insearch of work… Can you help me on that?”
Me: “Oh man, I wished you would have asked me last week. I just spent $43,243 on an investment last week and I’m broke now. That money is going to be tied up for at least two years. I’m kind of in the same position as you right now, temporarily broke. but you’re luckier than me because you have that guaranteed. I’m not guaranteed anything. I can lose it all.”

Her: “If I had asked you last week, you would have taken me for something else because we just met”
Me: “Well, I might have been more hesitant, but, you seem so nice. Can you send me a pic?”

Her: “Thanks. You mean now?”
Me: “Yes”

Her: “Okay. I’ll do just that. That’s me.That’s another one. Do you need one more? Do you love it?”

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Me: “Oh my. I look forward to your return to the United States! I’ll love to meet you too. Well, stay in touch. But I will be honest, there are a lot of women who want me, but I think it’s because they want my money. Gold diggers. I want somebody in my life who is genuine”

Her: “I won’t disappoint you”
Me: “Good. Well we can take our time to get to know each other while we both get our stuff straightened out. You seem like a really great gal. I hope I can live up to your expectations”

Her: “This is gonna be a tough week for me”
Me: “Yes, it is for me too. After that investment last week, I don’t even have enough gas to get to work. I have to sleep in my office all week and I only get 1 meal each day. but, if I win, I win.”

Her: “Yea. I pray we both win together”
Me: “I will win. And when you come back to the United States, you can come meet me.
but now isn’t a good time for me obviously because I’m tied up with investments.”

Her: “Okay, I’ll update you on any improvement”
Me: “Thank you for introducing yourself to me and asking to be a part of my life. Yes, please do.”

Her: “Okay. You welcome”
Me: “I have to run now. I just came back to my house to get some blankets, my pillow, and take a shower. I have to sleep on the floor in my office. . But the sacrifice will be worth it.”

Her: “Yea. Ok. Take good care of yourself”
Me: “I might be able to fly down there in a few months and meet you and help you out a little bit but it just depends on work. Stay in touch you beautiful angel. Do you have children?”

Her: “No”
Me: “Do you want children?”

Her: “Yea. What about you?
Me: “YES!”

Her: “Have you got kids before?”
Me: “No”

Her: “Okay I have to go now”
Me: “Me too. But, why did you pick me?”

Her: “I see you as a nice person”
Me: “Well stay in touch my beauty”

Her: “Ok”
Me: “I think you will like Hawaii. I like to go once a year, but I don’t get to go this year”

Her: “Why?”
Me: “Because I have to watch my finances this year. That investment is a big commitment”

Her: “Yea. Chat with you later”
Me: “Bye for now”

Her: “Ok. Bye. Stay in touch!”
Me: “Ok.Bye”

To Be Continued


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